Despite what the famous book told me, I didn’t learn all I needed to know in kindergarten. I learned a few things there, like please and thank you and not to eat the paste no matter how much it looks like fluffy frosting. Most of the rest was learned from growing up in a dysfunctional home, cutting my own bangs one too many times, and having a rare tumor. But I really acquired all my Dalai Lama level wisdom from Twitter. And now, you can too. Here’s every bit of advice you need to live a happy and successful life.
On health and diet:
On beauty and aging:
On living a clean life:
On finding love:
On being bilingual:
On the grass not always being greener:
On coping in the Trump years:
On being polite:
On cultivating empathy:
On fashion and fatherhood:
On killing two birds with one stone:
On adulthood being overrated:
On keeping it real:
On blogging, from your friendly neighborhood blogger, me:
We don’t swear too much, though.
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No, not us. Hahahaha!
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“Being a responsible adult blows. 0/5 stars. Do not recommend” – I have to agree with that review right there. When I had to tell my daughter she was going to have periods for the rest of her life it was like “Well – yeah it’s just gonna suck, kid, sorry.”
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I now understand why my mom’s only advice to me was, life’s not fair.
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Yep. Nailed it. And we don’t swear, it’s the echoes of the other sweary numpties as there foul oaths rebound from our open astonished mouths…
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You certainly have a way with words, the best way.
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Ah you are too kind
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I needed this today. Thank you!
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I feel so much smarter and wiser now. Thank you, I swear.
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Twitter wisdom…does it get any better than this? I think not.
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Swearing is allowed when you need a word to express deep emotion or make the world know your serious. The washing machine and tumbledryer are also good impliments to disguise a swearing rant, (Only works if you are right next to it on a fast spin cycle). My mother’s advice to me was “Do not come to me with problems of your own making, if you made it happen you can sort it out” Also “You made your bed, you lay in it.” Twitters wisdom should be bottled it is so good. But your tweet … if they didn’t do the thing that we used for a post they wouldn’t know we were writing about them, if they did then … fair game. Fun for thanksgiving. 😇😃😂
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These are all so good! And I especially love that last tweet of yours–once, I had to call my dad and ask, “Hey, is it OK if I blog about you saying ‘Penis’?” Surprisingly, he said NO. Good job I asked!
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A few years’ ago I couldn’t get into Twitter at all and had no idea how to work it. Once I started blogging, I suddenly sussed it. Love it now, even more so that Facebook…shhh!
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You mean… everybody can read my blog?!?
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Hahahaha!
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