Charlottesville. I do not even know where to begin. Even now, after reading all the articles, after pondering what has happened, after trying so hard to form some semblance of order in my thoughts, after forcing myself to sit behind the keyboard, I still don’t know what to say. I just watch the cursor blink and try to hold back the tears.
I read articles about torch wielding men shouting vile epithets. I watched a video of a man intentionally drive his car into a group of innocent people protesting white supremacy and Naziism. He succeeded in murdering one person and injuring 19 others. A young man dressed in a crisp white polo shirt, probably afforded every opportunity to live a full life, drove his shiny new car into a crowd of people, hellbent on believing his life is ‘less than’ because non-whites demand equality in our society.
When a reporter interviewed his mother she claimed to have no knowledge of his white supremacist leanings. She tries to stay out of it, she says. As far as she knew he was going to support President Trump and as far as she knew Trump wasn’t a white supremacist. Plus, her son had a black friend. You can’t be racist if you have black friends, right? Passively, painfully ignorant of the ideology her son ascribed to, or at least feigning ignorance. I can’t decide which is worse.
I wanted to write about Charlottesville immediately after learning what happened there, but it was all jumbled up inside me. I was angry and sad, but most of all, afraid of what more could happen. I couldn’t form a cohesive thought other than, this is bad, so bad.
I went to bed, tossed and turned. I woke up, still wanting to get out what I was feeling, needing what I would say to make sense. I couldn’t accomplish that. I ate breakfast, sat on my porch enjoying a hot cup of coffee. My heart was heavy, but still no words.
Lunch. More coffee. Hot soothing shower. Nothing.
Mid afternoon, my husband and I decided to take a drive with our son to look at some houses for rent. We drove through bucolic neighborhoods surrounded by gates, manicured lawns, kids swimming at the community pool. No one seemed particularly bothered. Everyone just carrying on with life. I wondered if their souls felt dark today.
I can sit here and say, Charlottesville happened because of Trump. It did. David Duke confirmed that. White supremacists voted for him because they knew he would give them a safe space to carry on with their mission. His policies and divisive rhetoric empower their hatred. The more bombastic his tone, the more they love and support him and make it possible for him to stay in power, the more inclined he is to be incendiary, the more emboldened they feel. It’s a symbiotic relationship from the bowels of hell.
But, the other reason Charlottesville happened is because too many of us were too quiet for too long because, for a lot of us, it’s easy to be quiet. I don’t wear a hijab. I can walk away when a conversation uncomfortably borders on racism. No one looks at me with wary eyes when I enter an airport. My pale, freckled skin and blue eyes don’t alert the attention of white supremacists. My son can wear a hoodie without fear. His blonde curls prove his innocence. I will never have to tell him to keep his hands out of his pockets.
No matter how much of an ally I consider myself, I do not live in the shoes of the people our president marginalizes. No matter that my heart is broken over their pain, I don’t live in their skin. I don’t endure what they do, day in and day out. They don’t get to take a long shower to collect their thoughts on Charlottesville. They don’t get to go on a long drive to get their minds off of it all. For them, Charlottesville happens every day in some form or fashion.
I was unusually quiet during this presidential election. There seemed to be an insurmountable wall of conspiracy theories and outright lies that I didn’t want to tackle. I didn’t think my words could change those minds. I felt it was enough for me to just not vote for Trump. It was enough for me to be silently disgusted by his abhorrent behavior. I felt that way because I have the luxury to do so. Charlottesville doesn’t happen to me every day in some form or fashion.
There is no more time to be quiet. We can’t pretend we don’t know. We can’t decide to stay out of it. If you are an ally it is no longer enough to merely believe this administration is wrong, it must be shouted for all to hear. Let them hear it through your lawful resistance. You cannot walk away from uncomfortable conversations. You are no longer allowed to hope for the best because it doesn’t directly impact your life.
In the words of Joe Biden, there is only one side.
Trump is on the wrong side.
If you oppose Trump and remain silent, you are on the wrong side too.
*Featured image courtesy of Pixabay.
Before I start giving my thoughts, I will say I detest Trump and all he stands for, though I am not sure if he knows what he believes in. He is just another puppet whose strings are being pulled by his advisors. He wanted power more than anything; his cohorts gathered information on what segment of society [as do ALL political parties] they needed to focus on to gain as many votes as possible. To put simply the majority of white working class in the US are unhappy that they are now on the bottom tier. All of a sudden this guy comes along who says he will make ‘our country great again’. Who would not grab that when you have nothing to lose in your small world. To be honest, all damned politicians are the same just depends on what you want to hear. NZ is now going through the pre-election “bullsh*t” now, same old just phrased differently!
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I have to disagree with you. Both Trump and his father have been investigated for refusing to rent their properties to blacks. Trump does want power, but he is no puppet. He appointed the people that he did because he is a racist and a misogynist. He knows what he wants and he’s never been shy about letting people know who he is. So, if someone voted for him they were able to set aside their own worries about his racism or they are racists themselves. We had other very qualified candidates. But her emails.
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Christine, I have not read that and it is interesting and not surprising. To be honest we very rarely watch the news as it is so one misleading in many ways. Don’t even go there with Clinton, she is just about as bad as Trump!! Rubio was about the best candidate and Bernie Sanders. Though what do I know 🙂
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No, Hillary Clinton is not just as bad as a racist, misogynist sociopath. Sorry. That narrative isn’t allowed anymore.
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Your opinion Christine. As I said most people and political parties are very one eyed and you have just reinforced that.
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I didn’t say you had to like her or vote for her or think anything positive about her, but you cannot and will not tell me she’s the worse of the two. You just can’t. And if that makes you think I’m close minded, so be it. I’m cool with that. I know who I am.
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Christine, I don’t usually get into political discussions not even with my husband! I really don’t have enough knowledge to debate it and so it was silly of me to start this. With that, I apologise for any misunderstandings, and no I don’t think you are close minded. Hate against hate just doesn’t work, doesn’t achieve peace. The American political mess is very sad, and I hope to God that something is settled soon as it will affect the world not only America. Peace 🙂
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But what am I hating? I have to ask you. I’m not hating anything other than an administration that provides a soft spot for racists to land. You were the one that suggested I am unable to see beyond my own political beliefs, which I have to tell you is not true. I will not let false narratives continue to be spread. You don’t have to like Hillary. Guess what? She wasn’t my first choice. But you can’t tell me in anyway that she is equally bad or worse to Trump. I have no issue with you having differing political opinions from me, but I won’t let you tell me I’m hateful for not feeding into lies. I won’t. A white supremacists murdered a woman peacefully protesting him. I’m mad. I should be. We all should be.
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For goodness sake Christine, calm down. I was making a general statement of one side against another. Not saying you are hating. Actually, I am more sad than angry that us humans can be so hateful. I don’t have strong political beliefs and as far as America goes, I don’t know enough about it or actually, I don’t have any desire to. What amazes me is how many Americans did not vote and now the whole world has to put up with Trump. Thanks, America!! Not directed at you Christine as obviously you did not vote for him and I would not have done so either. Yes, a bit of hard one I know!!
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No, I won’t calm down. A woman is dead. This isn’t the time to be calm.
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Really just one well we are in a country where there are thousands of traumatised people due to a blardy war. My heart goes out to them all and the people affected in America by racism. Okay, now I am annoyed. Enough thanks Christine.
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I can still care about the atrocity that happened here and be aware of and concerned for the other atrocities happening in the world. It’s insulting to suggest I don’t. So sorry I annoyed you with my piddly racism problem.
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And you’re more than welcome to not be bothered by me or my concerns anymore. I didn’t ask you to be here. You came of your own volition.
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Yours is one of many posts in my feed today, reflecting on Charlottesville. Most writers are expressing “What can we do? It’s so complex! It’s bigger than my puny efforts.”
I get that, the panic, the fear, the anger, and the deep sense of loss.
However. From the comfort of my chair several degrees north of the 49th parallel, it’s easier for me to remain unmoved. Note I write “easier” for of course I am horrified. But, my immediate world is not in chaos.
“I didn’t think my words could change those minds.” I would have thought the same. They wouldn’t have changed their minds.
And I also agree with your statements “There is no more time to be quiet. We can’t pretend we don’t know. You are no longer allowed to hope for the best because it doesn’t directly impact your life.”
It is time to speak up, to support the people who are in a position to make a change. Speak firmly, and confidently, and with compassion. People will more likely respond to compassion than they will to angry demands and threats.
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If the only thing we can do is use our voices to say, this is wrong, that’s at least a start. We can’t let the normalization of the administration gain any more traction.
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Powerful thoughts, Christine. I have been so withdrawn from talking politics and all of the news that is spinning out of control off the head of that buzz saw of a topic, but I guess it doesn’t work that way, you’re right.
Peace
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Well said. And kudos to you for using your platform here for such a good purpose
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And why don’t you have at least 1000 followers by now. Your writing is too good not to be read by so many more people.
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It’s a mystery for the ages, Phil. LOL!
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Give it time. You’ll get there
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Bravo Christine! I know many people here in Canada who are with you.
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“His blond curls prove his innocence.” What a line. I mean, seriously, I felt that in my bones. (Btw, you said it way better than I did.) ❤
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Better is relative.
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Excellent words Christine.
I am trying to work out what I can do to help. I’m on the same continent but as a foreigner in Canada I am not even sure when it is appropriate to comment. I mean I have been horrified at the Nazi-like ravings of some sections of the UK post-Brexit.
I honestly don’t know any one who thinks Trump is a good idea, so even when I share your words, they won’t reach people with a different opinion. I do have a few friends who are pro-Brexit, but they are all horrified by all this too. 😦
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The man has a 33% approval rating. There are more of us than there are of them. They just happen to be more vocal and more organized. All you need to do is speak up and speak out and keep doing it and keep doing it. If more of us who were quiet spoke out we would drown out the 33% easily.
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I’ll keep speaking up. 😀
My feed is already completely full of people that think this is all a nightmare (mostly not from the USA tbh) I think that is part of the problem though. People that love trump may well have un-followed people that are not keen, so they’ll never hear anti-trump views.
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They don’t want to. It’s not them that we’ll change. When the quiet ones get loud they will know they can’t mow us over. They feel empowered because of who the president is. We have to stop that.
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In that case, I really hope enough quiet folks wake up.
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Oh dear, as an outsider looking on….I am horrified and saddened at what I read in the news…I think we should all stand up and be counted ….I have a very hard time getting this hate that spews forth. I have family in the US and I don’t know their political views but I always remember their father and I loved my kind, gentle uncle but as I got older I was aware of his other side ( I heard my parents) talk of it. I was young, very young but he wouldn’t even let anyone of colour check out his goods or serve him in a restaurant which leads me to believe that it is inherent and learnt behaviour. Change has to come from the top down..Will that happen? at the moment I don’t believe it will. I have had a similar conversation with my 12 year old grandson ..today as he asked what I was watching and I tried to explain simply that it was wrong and I don’t know why people are like that and against one another..skin colour should not matter. His words to me( and he) is mixed race were ” we all have red blood” he is right.
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If change won’t come from the top down, resistance will rise up lawfully and make it happen.
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Your last comment couldn’t be more true. As I watched my hometown get invaded by these sick, sick assholes, I was heartbroken. I still am. But I have several reasons to hope, and that’s the only way I can keep moving and not huddle under my blankets sobbing (anymore). Reason 1) The reason violence errupted this weekend was that counterprotesters showed up. They showed up and said, “No, you don’t get to do this.” 2) At Jason Kessler’s press conference the next day, counterprotesters showed up and shouted him down and said, “No, you don’t get to do this.” 3) On Twitter, people have “outted” many of the white supremacists who attended, and some have been fired by bosses who said, “No, you don’t get to do this.” and 4) I attended a rally in Durham in support of Charlottesville yesterday, and when Nazis showed up and started trying to shout over our speakers, we sang them down. We drowned them out with song. People are speaking up. Yes, more need to, but it’s a start and this weekend was a wake-up call for a hell of a lot of people. We just need to keep singing.
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Aaaaaaaaaaaaamen, sister!!
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